What If Your “Flaws” Are Actually Strengths? Rewriting the Stories You Carry About Yourself
I’ve been called stubborn by my family growing up, and I thought that was something I should feel ashamed of until very recently.
Here’s the story.
The Quality I Had Internalized as a Flaw
I was on a family Zoom call recently, and we were asking my aunt about my 4-year-old niece and how she’s doing.
She jokingly mentioned that it’s been said that my niece is even more stubborn than I was when I was a child
Three things came to mind at that moment.
#1: I thought it was funny 😂
#2: I didn’t know I was considered that stubborn as a child, although I do remember adults in my family teasing me about it.
#3: I realized I had internalized some shame around it — and therefore, it was something I needed to examine.
After reflecting on it for a few days, I realized that my stubbornness as a child was actually a strong internal compass being expressed. I knew from a very young age what I wanted and didn’t want to experience in life. My stubbornness was simply me sticking with what I wanted (and not what other people wanted).
It was probably frustrating for the adults around me, and probably had something to do with gender socialization, too, so I was teased about it.
Reframing My Stubbornness as a Strength
Despite feeling embarrassed about it growing up, my stubbornness has actually been one of my biggest assets in life — and something I should feel proud of.
It’s allowed me to stay focused and consistent with my goals and dreams despite many obstacles. It’s prevented me from settling for less than what I really want in my relationships, career and life.
Without my stubbornness, I would have given up long ago and settled for a more traditional life that probably wouldn’t have suited me.
I felt this perspective shift transmute my shame into confidence and pride in who I am— stubbornness and all. I felt a deeper inner strength and wholeness fill my heart, like something was healed.
What If Your “Flaw” Is Actually a Strength?
What quality do you possess that you feel a little bad or ashamed about, but has actually been a huge asset for you?
It’s probably something you were taught growing up wasn’t an appropriate quality to have according to your culture or society, but it’s actually turned out to be a huge strength in your life.
Maybe it’s how stubborn you are — but it’s actually helped you stay consistent and focused on achieving your goals and dreams, no matter how long it takes.
Or maybe it’s how imaginative and visionary you are. Other people might think you’re unrealistic, but it’s actually allowed you to envision a very different kind of life for yourself and really go for it.
Or maybe it’s how empathic and sensitive you are. Perhaps you’ve been taught to see yourself as too sensitive or weak, but actually your ability to feel into the emotions and energies of others in your environment is a gift when you learn how to use it in the right way — just like a superpower!
Or maybe you’re introverted in a culture that values extroversion — but actually your introversion gives you special qualities, like being able to create new things from your own imagination and connect more deeply with others one-on-one. (Have you read the book Quiet by Susan Cain? It helped me finally feel proud of my introversion.)
Or maybe you’ve felt embarrassed or bad about identifying with something more non-traditional — like your sexuality, relationship preferences, lifestyle or career. But maybe it’s actually been a blessing because you’ve learned to more strongly stand up for yourself and what you want in life — which can inspire other people to be more courageous in their lives, too.
Rewriting the Negative Stories You Carry About Yourself
What comes to mind for you?
How can you shift your perspective so you can see this part of yourself as a blessing and a positive quality, despite what mainstream society says or the people around you might think?
When you examine the negative stories you carry about yourself that subconsciously make you feel shame, guilt or unworthiness, and decide to see them in a more empowering and positive light, you can begin to heal your relationship with yourself and feel more confident, worthy and empowered as who you truly are.
Examining the stories you carry about yourself — and deciding to rewrite them — is a powerful form of self-healing.
How Pranic Healing Can Help You Release Old Stories
This is something I often encourage my clients to explore when these old stories come up during a session.
It also beautifully complements the energy work we do in Pranic Healing sessions, helping you release layers of old emotions, negative thought patterns and limiting beliefs connected to the way you learned to see yourself in the past — but that no longer serve who you are today.
If you’re stepping into a new chapter of your life and want to release the old stories that no longer fit who you’re becoming, Pranic Healing sessions can help you navigate your transformation with more ease, flow, peace and speed.
Here’s what a previous client shared:
“Through her work I have felt more accepting of myself and a willingness to invite self compassion in.”
— Georgia
Explore my Pranic Healing services to learn how I can support you in releasing what no longer serves you and stepping into the next version of yourself with more self-love, confidence and alignment.
Wishing you more positive feelings, thoughts and perspectives about yourself — because you truly are a powerful and amazing being! 🩷
Suzie DeVoe
Associate Certified Pranic Healer
Helping people release what no longer serves them, embody who they’re becoming and step into their next chapter